The Mammies » Conversations in Teenage ville

Conversations in Teenage ville

The kid’s mate dropped down, K. They were hanging on the couch and the following coversation ensued:
Phone rings
“Its me , yeah what about me ginge, hey, what’s up? Ya what? He did what? I’ll kill him. No, hold on” turns to the mate K, “its me ginge, the boyf bate her up”
Shocked reaction from the mate K.

“No, hold on, I was telling K, yeah, you okay, no way, okay hold on, how are ya feeling? Ya, a course, no don’t worry I’m on it” Hangs up. Retells story to K and us. We were sortof used to this sort of conversation and so we nod in all the right places.

Phone rings again, another mate. She starts crying when she hears it, this makes the kid and K feel better about getting their mate to get some friends and head to some place that begins with the word poppy. Kids hangs up and another discussion ensues. Phone rings again, at this stage both K and the kid are on the phone.

“Yeah , do you know someone, I need someone bate up. No, for real” I ask her if she’s on the phone to Dial a Gangster and if there is something big going down’, I want no part of it.
Hey, I watch enough gangster movies to know when a hit is going down. The following conversation would most likely make sense if you were 17 or stoned.
“Yeah, okay listen D, right you got transport?” I stupidly ask who D is
“He’s the guy that wants to give you sperm”
Its always nice to hear this from your kid so I stop asking questions.
“Right, you know some skinheads?” Obviously this guy was answering in the affirmative because she continued with the planning and plotting.
“Head to , take a left at the ginge with the broken jaw and keep going until you see a fellow that looks like a dolphin. He shagged his sister, apparently. I KNOW!, anyways, you call me when the job is done, right?”
She hangs up, turns to the mate and says in all seriousness
“Its gonna be sorted”
I ask if the guy is so stupid why they can’t ring him up and ask him to beat himself up. They look at me, so I refrain from making any more stupid suggestions like that. So now I have this image of my head of this stoner, she told him to look like a junkie to ‘fit in’ and so the dolphin won’t suspect anything, driving around this imaginery place looking for a dolphin to beat up? Oh to be 17 again. I told her she was probably taking the skinheads away from beating up poor defenseless foreigners. Cue more eye rolling.

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